13 Tweets To Get You Through The Week
Is 13 an unlucky number? No, there’s no such thing as luck! The only thing you should expect and look forward to is the eventual heat death of the universe. Or Friday, whichever comes sooner. So in the meantime here’s a collection of tweets to get you through the week.
Big news right out the gate this week as Andrew Little stands down as Labour leader and Jacinda Ardern takes over. Toby Morris sums the whole thing up in his latest comic. Trump is off busy doing Trump stuff, but you can read every other publication for his zany antics.
— Toby Morris (@XTOTL) August 1, 2017
Daddy Bear -"Someones been sleeping in my bed."
Mummy Bear -"Wouldn't be the first time."
Daddy Bear -"It's been 3 years Sue, let it go."
— Fuzzy felt eyebrows (@TheRealNickKay) January 29, 2015
"What Your Handwriting Reveals About Your Intelligence" the blogger types on her Macbook Pro.
— June (@junejuly12) June 6, 2017
Me: Eventually everything dies.
7-year-old: Until you charge it.
— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) August 1, 2017
Interviewer: You're hired..
Me: Thank you so much! You won't live to regret this..
— Obi (@ThaJawn) April 20, 2016
Being an adult is just walking around wondering what you're forgetting
— Josh (@iwearaonesie) July 31, 2017
Me: I'm exhausted
Fitbit: You have taken 11 steps today
— Oaks (@oakhillbargrill) July 31, 2017
i got a white noise machine to help me sleep but it just says things like "i have many Latino friends" & "you should check out this podcast"
— The Pan-Midwesterner (@panmidwest) March 24, 2017
Wow your rib cage and hip bones look stunning !!!
Said No Man Ever
— Midnight Cowboy (@cowboyjeffkent) December 5, 2013
*in dentist chair w/tools in mouth*
*"Livin' on a Prayer" comes on*
*eyes dart rapidly*
WHOAAA IFFIN AWW A PAIR
— Aimee Helene (@AimeeHelene1) September 19, 2016
Wonder what crimes God committed that people always find him in prison.
— CrazyMyra (@NotOnTheMoors) July 19, 2017
Maybe think twice before getting that haircut.
You know, mull it over.
— Beth (@mejustbeth) July 21, 2017
Working at McDonald's at 16 taught me I didn't want to work at McDonald's at 17.
— June (@junejuly12) June 19, 2017
If these aren’t enough tweets for you read 15 more from last week, when all the news was about the new Doctor Who.